Funny things Nolan does

I made ceaser salad tonight and told him to get the stinky feet cheese, He proceeded to grad the chedder and step on it then pick it up and sniff it, with a crinkled up nose looks at me and says EWWWWW GWOSSS.
His hamster bit him the other day it drew blood but was nothing serious, But now when you ask him where Ruby is he will tell you she bites and show you his finger.  He makes me laugh on a daily basis with the stuff he says and does he is quite the comedian and knows it. We were watching Lady and the Tramp yesterday, He got all bent out of shape because the dogs were fighting, He got up and yelled No Biting, Enough stop it, Stop biting. It was adorable! I hinted to my grandma today about moving there I think she knows but doesn't want to admit she does, We had a good talk about it though it kind of opened my eyes to a few things.

Slacking

I have kind of slacked on posting these last few days. Life has been quite hectic my son is in the Terrible Twos and they are terrible, he's into everything!! I am finding it so hard to discipline him, Don't get me wrong I will set boundaries but he's just so cute and sweet, Sometimes I have to do a double take to really know its my sweet little boy doing all this. So today I called the internet and phone company to tell them I would like to cancel the service for April 2nd, They tried to charge me cancellation fees when they don't offer the companies services in the U.S. But if I move to some random place waaaay up north where I am still in Canada but cannot connect with the services then they will wave the cancellation fees. Come on really you want me to pay because you guys don't offer service in another country that's not my fault!!!! I have come to the conclusion I am going to melt and half die of heat when I move to Georgia, I can bairly deal with Canada in the summer, I AM a winter person. I love the snow and everything you get to do tobogganing, Skiing, Skating, Snow angels, Making snowmen when ever you want. It's endless the amount of stuff you can do I will miss being able to do those things on a drop of a hat. Someday I think if only I could split myself in half and be both places, I could have it all it would be perfect.

Today was a much better day, I didn't stress as much about the next few months. Nolan helped me peel hard boiled eggs today, I think he ate more than he peeled but hey he's a growing little boy. I still have not found a new home for the two cats my mom dropped off when I was down south. The poor things just want to be loved and have a good home, I wish I could just bring them with me so they don't have to feel rejected by me as well. It must have been hard enough coming to this strange place.  My grandmother is watching Nolan this weekend and he is so excited when we wake up he asks for Amma, When I tell him she's at work he asks for Uncle Ray and I tell him the same that he is at work, Nolan actually huffs at me and furrows his eyebrows. He got this toy fishing rod for Christmas this year, He has found a new way to play with it by letting the line out and running around so the one cat chases him. There is so much excitement in his eyes that sometimes I wanna close mine and not look cause it makes my heart swell and I feel as though it could explode with love.

Well that's enough this morning I shall be back tomorrow

Trying not to think

Today was a small step for me I finally told my one friend, She was quite surprised and asked me why I would leave my family and friends as they are my support system. I had no answer only that I want my son to know his father. I am going to see my sister I think I am going to try and figure out a way to muster up the courage and tell her, Hopefully she takes it a bit better. I can't stop worrying about the what if's, what if we just don't connect it will have been 4 months since seeing each other, What if, What if, What if? I know I cannot base it on the what if's but man when one come fifty more follow. I pray I am making the right decision because if not and I come back I have to start from the bottom again and work my way up, I pray my family doesn't hate me and can forgive me for leaving, It's not like I will never talk to them again or see them again. I have been exceptionally blessed to have some of the most amazing family members any one could ever ask for! One day at a time cause for me and living in Canada it's running out so i better hurry up and figure this out.

Confused

I am at a super confusing point in my life. I have made the decision to move from Toronto, Canada to Georgia, U.S.A. I have not told my family as they do not like my boyfriend, we have been together for 4 years going on 5. We have a child together and I want him to be apart of his sons life, I just cannot find the words to tell my family that the flights booked. I want to go but I love my Grandparents and Uncle so much, they took me in when I wasn't wanted by my parents. They taught me so much, I love them more than words can say and knowing that they wouldn't think it's a good idea for me to move there is killing me, I don't want them to be disappointed in me. It hurts to see them be there and love my son the way they do, only for me to take him to live in another country. They have watched him grow up and just been amazing to him, I don't know how to tell them with out breaking their hearts and crushing them, I mean like we don't go more than 2 days without talking. I don't know what to do and it's eating me inside knowing and keeping it from them, but I know if I do tell them I won't be able to bring myself to go see them and watch them cry. I don't know what to do I am so confused!