Decided to add a cat

So after alot of discussion Charlie and I have finally agreed to get a kitten, we decided to get a Sphynx or a Bengal. We have informed Nolan of us going to inquire about kittens and all he could say was that he wanted to name it horse, I don't know where he got horse from but if that's what he wants then we are going to  consider it.  We are now in the process of looking for a breeder and whatever one we think is a good fit for us, we will then put a deposit down for a kitten.  It's been really hard lately to get Charlie on the same page as me for disciplining Nolan, I don't want to be the parent that spanks or yells at him. I use the naughty stair and it works really well for Nolan, he realizes that what he was doing is not OK and he doesn't do it again until he forgets about it. But Charlie would rather raise his voice to him and I really don't like it, I grew up in a household that all my mom did was yell and cuss at us and I really don't want Nolan growing up like that. I have tried to explain to Charlie just tell him no calmly and move him to the naughty stair but Charlie just goes and says hes too tired from work. I feel am starting to feel like in away this might have been a mistake to come down here after only a 3 week visit with him since he moved back to Georgia from Canada. I want Nolan to have the best possible childhood and not have one like Charlie or I had growing up, it's also getting to me that Charlies parents don't want Nolan disciplined around them "because it's time to visit with them not be punished" is what we have been told. Well first of all they have a pool and hot tub that is at ground level and all Nolan has to do is loose his balance and go head first in the pool, and I don't care how much money they have if Nolan is ruining something that belongs to them I am going to discipline him for it because it's not OK to destroy stuff. I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place because all I want is for our family to be together but I am feeling almost like I have no say in how my son is raised due to their laziness and views.  I am also getting annoyed at the fact that Charlies parents bought the house we live in and his car and pay all the bills, I am fine with that whats annoying is that they think they have the right to tell me when the wedding is going to be and who all is coming. NEWS FLASH I am the type of person if I am told all the plans that have to do with our wedding that I am just going to wear the most fucked up outfit possible, I have no issue going and getting married in my bathrobe just to prove a point. This wedding was supposed to be and eloping type of deal and now it's all the family is coming and all this shit. I will prove them they cannot boss me around like they do their son, I am not some push over whos gonna bow down to someone just because they have money.

I have been really slacking on posts and I am sorry for that. I have been quite busy, we went to Kentucky, Nolan has had strep then when he got all better he got some other cold type illness that had his temperature at 102.8 So ts been kinda crazy. So I will start with Kentucky we went for the long weekend and i have now officially met Charlies other side of the family, I don't know why I was so stressed out about it because they were amazingly friendly and so sweet to Nolan and I. He has one of the coolest families I have met in my life they all get along and are funny as hell man. I cannot wait to go hang out with them again. So Nolan being sick has been quite the experience I should start off by saying that Nolans only ever been sick maybe 4 times and had antibiotics twice now, So it was quite a new thing for me, it was so sad for me to sit and watch him be all wheezy and congested. So he educated himself on the show Whale Wars on Animal planet, at time he got so into it he would start yelling at them no fighting. hes finally getting better now hes still congested but 100 times better than he was.
So Nolan and I both have come to the conclusion that it's so freaking hot here we might melt, Canada gets hot but this is a whole different kinda hot like in the 100's hot and it was still May when this was happening, At this moment I would pay crazy money for it to snow here lol. i know it will never happen but shit I can wish. 
It's also getting harder and harder to even speak of my family I really miss  them, I just want to hug them. I miss my uncle alot and I don't get to talk to him that much because its really hard for him, He was super close to Nolan, like he was Nolans male influence for a year. Nolan would call my uncle and talk to him and get so excited to see him and go in his truck, or go to the cottage with him. My life would be perfect if I could live down here and my family did as well. Nolan was swinging last night and asked me if he could go to uncle ray rays house. Every black or brown dog is ether Sam or Georgia to him it breaks my heart.

Nolan is no longer afraid of going in the car wash, he watched SharkTales and thinks its the Whale wash from the movie, so everytime we get in the car he asks if we can go to the car wash, which is better than him covering his eyes and shaking due to fright.  
I wish there was an app for blogger that I could post from that way I could just post more often and wouldn't need to get to the comp at home when I had a free moment in the car I could do it. Well I shall try to keep updating more regularly
Ta Ta For Now

Fish multiplying faster than the water can flow

So life has been crazy since I posted last, Nolan has got strep, Charlie and I hit a rocky patch for about a week, I feel I am dying inside due to the lack of physical and visual contact with my family. We got Nolan some Dalmation mollies the fish and within 4 days we now have 9 more so 12 in total now.  My family is going to the cottage this weekend for the whole weekend and I really want to go and celebrate my birthday there. My birthday present is a dishwasher how fucking step-ford wife is that, like common go buy me a tattoo or something not some dumb ass dishwasher don't get me wrong I am glad to not have to wash all the dishes all the time but it just reminds me of how old I am getting. If I could create a play-list for the last week it would be some super angry rock music fallowed by some super sappy heartbroken stuff. On the other hand I just got a Wii and Wii fit plus thanks to the future in laws, I have been trying to keep a schedule of working out and they thought it would help me. We are going to the Georgia Aquarium this Saturday I think I am more excited than Nolan is. Well Nolan wants to cuddle so gotta go

Dog shit galore!

Just as I was getting comfortable with Nolan playing outside in his grandparents backyard they find a water moccasin.  Oh the stress of living where there are venomous snakes and poisonous spiders is nerve racking, Find snakes in the backyard and spiders in the house. Where the hell is safe for a 2 year old to play?

Cannot go to the park because the nasty people who live in this subdivision, Think it's OK to use the wood chip stuff on the ground as a dog litter box. Like common you have a back yard why don't you just let them shit there and not pick it up, do you enjoy watching kids play where your dog shits? I don't understand the dog owners here why have a dog if you cannot take responsibility for what it does? Are you ashamed to pick it up in public? if so take the dog to your back yard. And to top it off when called out about it they say "ohh I forgot a bag", really cause I am pretty sure if I didn't say anything about it the shit would still be there in the morning.

I cannot believe it's Easter this weekend I feel like I just got here a week ago. How has it gone by so quickly?  I have gotten used to not expecting to see my Grandma and Uncle on the weekends though it still hurts to think of them, I just want to curl up in a ball and cry some days I miss them so much.  I talk to her everyday but it still hurts alot, I just want to go hug her and see her in person. I am trying to not think about when it will be the next time I see my family, It was my moms Birthday yesterday I called her and wished her a Happy Birthday. Every time I talk to my mom she cries it makes me hurt that much more, I couldn't imagine what it would be like if Nolan moved away so I know what they must feel. Nolan is adjusting find though he does ask for them alot in the day and when I talk to them he does too, I think he really misses my Uncle he was the closest to him and when Nolan speaks to my Grandma he always asks for him. I can feel myself getting more and more homesick even though this is my new home, it's wonderful here don't get me wrong I just miss my family.

Bought the new Cage the Elephant CD today amazing is all I have to say about it!! Also started shopping for Nolans Easter, Got Charlie finished and now it's just the rest of Nolans stuff to get tomorrow.

Well gotta go save the rest for another day!!

Long time no type

It's been a little while since I updated last, We are now in Georgia and have met with lawyers. We have set a date to get married, and only have to go pick out rings now. It\s crazy living here is such a product shock, I went to get Nolan "cheesy noodles" Kraft Dinner and cannot seem to find it anywhere. I am also dying for Tim Horton's, these coffee places suck I have come to the conclusion that I am gonna have to ship timmies down here. I miss my family but am finding a great comfort in talking to them everyday, Nolan misses them a lot too he talks to them on his toy phone and tells them he misses them too.  Some days I just wish I could jump on a bus and go see them for a few hours. It's definitely nice here we finally got Nolan his new bedroom outft so now he has a big boy bed, It's a twin bedroom outfit that's NFL themed. We got him a outer space sheet set and I just noticed it glows in the dark. Well I promise to write more often now that we are settled in.

How do I say goodbye?

Where do I begin to say goodbye? How do I go without saying goodbye and leaving them to think I am coming back in 2 months. It's hitting me like a ton of bricks now that I have just over a week left with my family, I know it's not forever but I also know that if I tell them before I go it will crush them. I am still stuck and would love someone to just give me an opinion. ughhh why is it so complicated?

Less than 2 weeks

Holy, Where has it gone? I am trying to contain my excitement about leaving to live in Georgia, It's working so far. AHHHHHH I am soo excited wow. I cannot wait to go buy all new summer clothes and sandles. To finally be able to curl up on the couch and watch a movie in Charlies arms again, To have Nolan,Charlie and I do family things again |EEEk it's going to be great again. As you can clearly tell it's sooo not working. Nolan is getting excited too, he knows when we get there we are going to the Georgia Aquarium to see the whale sharks and daddy. Let the count down begin!!

Time speeding by!

Time is speeding by, I have this weekend and next weekend with my family then Saturday the 2nd we fly out. Where did the time go? I still have not bought all the boxes I need to ship Nolans toys and my clothes, I still have to go to donate a ton of stuff! As it gets closer I find myself becoming more and more calm about leaving, though you would think it would be opposite seeing as I have told no one but Mel and mentioned it to my Grandma. I think I am just getting really excited to finally live with Charlie again and be the family that we once were. I have been looking at things to do and have made a list of stuff, kind of like a bucket list but a bucket list for the rest of the year. I want to go to the Georgia aquarium, eat alligator and snake, have turtle soup, go to the ocean, buy a German Sheppard, hopefully go to school while there or at least take a course on something, and try to get a job at a tattoo parlor and become an apprentice. Those are the things I would like to accomplish before 2011 is over.

Yesterday I had to go pick out my frames for glasses at the mall, I had them growing up but when I went to the eye doc last he said my eyes were fine. So 5 years later I am back at the eye doc and shes telling me I need them again! The same prescription that I had, It makes me wonder if I needed them all along. But anyway I picked out these super cute black and purple Ray-Bans, I love them, finally for the first time ever I found a pair that I actually love and not just like. If I was a little more blog smart I would post a pick of them but |I have no idea on how to do that so.

While in the mall we saw a reptile zoo that was there for march break. Nolan got so excited to see the stuff, The staff let him touch an alligator, and 2 snakes he was over the moon with excitement. He kept telling my grandmother about the snakes and that he touched them it was too cute. 

Ordered a super cool watch today off the internet, it's the type where you can see the gears moving and such. I am so stoked for it, my last watch I fell in love with was a Timex iron man, I love it so much every time it died or I broke it, I would buy the same one. But I finally found a super nice looking one. I also bought a bracelet and pendent. the bracelet is a basic one that I can put charms on and the pendent is a mickey mouse silhouette, with a black smaller silhouette on top of that with swarovski crystals in that.

I think I am revealing stress by shopping eeek what a horrible idea!!
Well that concludes this blog entry!!

Packing

Well I started packing my stuff today, I will be shipping the boxes later this week. I didn't think it would sneek up on us so fast, it seemed like so long when we first made the plans. So we spoke to the lawyer today he said it will take about 8 months to get the green card, And that we should apply for a fiancee visa and it could make it go faster. It's not like we have not talked about getting married before we just couldn't find the time, I told Charlie if he goes and makes some huge deal asking me to marry him I will tell him no. I am not the kind of person who deals well with being put on the spot in public, unless it's for comedic reasons. I still have not told most of my family, I spoke to my grandmother about it and I did tell her but it crushed her, she said she was going to have to space herself from us because it hurt her to much, I couldn't deal with that so I told her the next day that I was just going for 2 months and then would decide. I know it was really wrong of me to do that to her and it will most likely make it harder but I need to spend as much time with her and my uncle as possible before we leave.

I looked at phone plans today WTF is with Sprint and no IPhone? I have to go with Sprint as I am being put on Charlies parents company phone plan, But common who doesn't carry the IPhone it's the best one out there. I don't care for the android phones and that's all they seem to have, they don't even carry good BlackBerrys. All the phones I looked at have ether no flash for the camera, or are just ridiculously ugly and not practical for me. I think I am going to go with the HTC EVO 4G I don't like it but it seems to be the only good one they offer.

common sense?

So today when talking about moving, I saw tears come to the strongest man I knows eyes. He is the most relaxed person, most calm easy going person that you could ever meet, He's my Uncle. As the time to move comes closer I am somewhat questioning my decision to go, I am even going to pay my rent until July that way if I change my mind Nolan and I still have a place to come back to. Charlie and I have had a rough couple years, his sponsorship got denied, he got deported from Canada, He became a person I didn't know. We got in a huge fight and when I decided to leave to get away from the arguing he freaked and jumped on my back to take the phone from me so I couldn't call anyone, to go stay there. I called the police he was charged and got probation. He has definitely changed he's a lot more relaxed, and calm I assume it's due to the lack of stress. But I cannot stop wondering what if we just cannot get along? What if we have no connection living together? It has been a year April since we lived together. I don't know if this is stress and my anxiety talking or common sense? How do I know if this is right? what if I make the wrong decision it affects Nolan too not just me.